Suzy & Mickey’s Blog – June 2025
Suzy: How are things at Shovelstrode?
Mickey: Pretty good. Our big hole is coming along nicely.
S: Big hole?
M: The one we are digging in paddock next to the gallops.
S: Ooooohhh, kayyyy.
M: Aren’t you digging one?
S: No.
M: Why not?
S: Don’t need one. Really don’t understand why you need one.
M: Once you start it is strangely compelling. Once you start digging, gotta keep on digging, keep on digging, gotta dig.
S: But surely there HAS to be a purpose?
M: We are too far from the sea for that. We’ve got a dog called Digger, but he doesn’t dig. Well, not much. Also, the hole may have been Stitch’s idea, and if he is going to use it, then a big hole is needed.
S: What does Stitch plan to use it for?
M: You know, I never thought to ask. I just got carried away by the glorious concept. I think the world would be a better place if we all stopped needing a reason to do things.
{That could go either way – Ed.}
S: You might just have a point there. For instance, do we think Kanye West waits for a reason to do things? No way.
M: I have no idea who Kanye West is, but he sounds like a solid and reliable fellow, from what you say. I imagine that when he has a hole, he is the sort to keep on digging.
{Spot on, even closer to the truth than you can imagine – Ed.}
S: Where would you recommend that I did my hole?
M: Cannot really say, but when you are on the right spot, then a sixth sense will tell you.
S: So I just walk around aimlessly, until some sort of mystical force gives me a clue.
{It sounds silly, but just ask George Lucas how much money it has made him – Ed.}
M: Absolutely. Although persuading 20th Century Fox to let him keep the worldwide merchandise rights was a big help. Is it time for this month’s letters yet?
S: We got this perceptive one from a Mr G. Lucas of Hollywood a couple of weeks ago. It says that he senses we are shortly about to suggest that Star Wars is a bit silly, and to do so would be slanderous. And expose us to ridicule. It seems a bit harsh to me.
M: I would advise him to strip out all the advances is special effects and consider the plot and script. I think we are on pretty solid ground once that is done.
S: So is that where I should dig my hole?
{transcript cut short for fear of getting stuck in an existential loop – Ed.}
Editor’s note: I consulted with Stitch and he advised me that he is conducting an experiment into the mentality of leadership, followers and why sometimes a cult develops and other times it does not. He asked that the subjects are not informed until his observations are complete. He regrets the interference from George Lucas, but acknowledges that Mr Lucas has a past history of tinkering with things apparently long completed.