Monty’s Award – November 2023 Blog

In the last month the novelty of staying indoors to help the leg repairs has rather worn off. I did promise everyone that if they let me go out in a field, I would not indulge in any bucking, kicking, larking about or anything that may cause an injury setback. Obviously that promise was not worth the paper it was written on, so I did not actually get it written down, but they did not believe me anyway, so I just went out into the barn every day. On one of those days there seemed to be an incident with one of the doves, but I really cannot remember if it was me involved or not, or another horse, or a dog. Maybe the chickens set it up, to save themselves from a fox? Anyway, the dove is no longer around to clarify the exact chain of events, so I think we can leave it at that. Hopefully someone will clear away the pile of feathers, as they are annoying me.

My helper monkey decided to try and cheer me up with some jokes. Now I have as good a sense of humour as the next horse…

{Anyone who makes a statement like that usually has no sense of humour at all – Ed.}

…but I think this is really scraping the barrel. I am told it is “post-modern tech humour.” That translates to “not funny,” I believe. What do you make of this?

My dog has no nose!

How does he smell?

I wrote an app to help him.

Most of the people reading this are on my side already, but I will offer up one more, just to win over the remaining few doubters.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because Google Maps told him to.

Now I could imagine how someone might see a bit of ironic wit in fifty-three jokes all of which have an animal species set up and an app usage punchline, but I do not have the time for that. Anyway, a short blog this time as I am about to use up a lot of time as I watch the director’s cuts of The Lord Of The Rings and The Hobbit film trilogies all in one long unbroken splurge. Hobbits on horses? Now that is funny. Although it is also flat racing…